


Perchance He’s Living - ficlet

by deawrites



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-05
Updated: 2017-10-05
Packaged: 2019-01-09 11:04:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12275115
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deawrites/pseuds/deawrites
Summary: Harvey thinks about a lot of the changes that have happened since Jim's come home from the hospital.  See, "Perchance to Live" for background story about Jim's injury if you're interested.





	Perchance He’s Living - ficlet

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Perchance to Live](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12258237) by [deawrites](https://archiveofourown.org/users/deawrites/pseuds/deawrites). 



> All comments, kudos, criticisms, requests and questions welcome.
> 
> To my Wife who just be happy I posted something.

 

**Gordlock: Perchance He’s Living**

Jim was different, yet Harvey refused to allow himself to let go of the younger man. Where there were times he grieved for the Jim he had lost, even if the one he had gained was just as beautiful in his way. There was a clear divide of before the damage to the frontoparietal area of his brain, and after. The iron willed, reckless, brilliant detective was gone. The justice driven force of nature that Harvey had come to respect and follow, that pulled him back into being a cop to be proud of; was no more. Jim still worked for the GCPD yet in a far different capacity. He worked in Records and Research, where the pace was slower and he could take more time with the materials to come up with a lead or perspective his fellow detectives missed.  His short-term memory was a bit scattered at times, and he could no longer understand the intellectual backgrounds and nuances of the art he still loved going to various Gotham galleries or museums to see.  His brain now followed different pathways to problem solving than previously, but in Harvey’s opinion he was still a smart, vibrant person intellectually, though it often took him a little longer to reach the similar conclusions.

 

It wasn’t merely his intellect that had shifted, yet more dramatically his personality had. The previous Jim would have been frustrated and angered by his lightened grasp of academia. He would have pouted and roared in fury, be impatient and self-critical until Harvey would have to console him with the patience of a long-suffering mother. The altered version of Jim was not bothered by the observed shift in his intellect. To Jim it was as if he had always been at a lower I.Q. score now than what he had been previously. The number merely didn’t matter to him, the fact that he was still a cop that could make a difference helping people did. Jim had more patience then Harvey doubted had ever existed beneath Jim’s surface before the attack. He was also calm in a way that haunted Harvey’s memory of Jim. While he enjoyed the fact that Jim was not likely to lash out in verbal violence or fly off the handle at any injustice until he was nearly frothing at the mouth, it was quite jarring to witness. New Jim; as Harvey affectionately titled him in his mind; smiled more, seemed happier where Old Jim had been morose and pensive.  In some ways it was as if Jim had left the jock/goth clichés and become a free spirit. Freer to be certain, but there were aspects of the damage they had not even encountered yet, Harvey was convinced. Within time they would surface but for now he observed and accepted, mourned and remembered as his new relationship with Jim blossomed.

 

The biggest surprise that Harvey had to come to terms with was that Jim told everyone what he was feeling, when he was experiencing it. Gone were the days he remained tight lipped, cheek twitching, eyes narrowing or widening as appropriate. His silent, withdrawn, presence had vanished overnight. The fateful morning at two a.m. when Jim had shown up bandaged and pale, freshly escaped from the hospital, just to tell Harvey he was in love with him was now the benchmark of his behavior rather than extreme exception. Harvey wasn’t certain how to deal with New Jim’s penchant for not withholding his emotions and thoughts. While it was refreshing it was also frightening in its way, as one of Jim Gordon’s defining personality traits had been his in ability to tell someone what he was feeling.  Although the fear was childish, Harvey couldn’t help wondering if the new improved version of Jim would wise up and leave him; find Leslie and explain how things were now and rekindle his relationship with her. Or merely outright choose another woman over Harvey. Yet when Harvey had carefully brought Leslie to the foreground of conversation to test his theory; or perhaps make the self-prophecy manifest; Jim had merely shaken his head and said, “I don’t love her anymore,” before following up with a heartfelt, “You’re the only one I love or want, _ever_.”

 

The beautiful words had relieved Harvey somewhat at the time, but he wondered just how they would hold up if Leslie Tompkins ever returned to Gotham. Harvey discovered he needn’t have worried, as a mere few months later she came back fresh from mourning her husband’s death and hating Jim for it. She returned to her previous position at the GCPD as the in house medical examiner and her first encounter with Jim had been shocking for her to say the least. She had heard the rumors circulating, come to ask Harvey to his face if they were true, but nothing had prepared her for Jim’s reaction to her. He granted her a soft smile, eyes looking at her as if he were meeting a distant relation before welling with tears at the memory of a lost child between them. He had hugged her and apologized for making her go through the loss on her own, before pulling back and wiping away a few tears. He then welcomed her back to Gotham and returned to his work, while she watched him with a stunned and frozen expression. Following their interaction Leslie grappled with her own emotions about New Jim and in the end befriended him as well as Harvey as much as her broken; yet healing; heart would permit.

 

Harvey wasn’t complaining that he was fortunate enough to have the love of his life; in any capacity; living with him. New Jim was utterly devoted to and excited by his older lover. There were times when Harvey heard the words, “Can we just cuddle?” exit his mouth when all he really needed to do was sleep. Jim was always accommodating and thrilled just to be with him at all. Jim liked to do domestic activities at home, and he urged Harvey to take him traveling on long weekends or at least once a month. There was even discussion about rescuing a dog from the pound, to which Harvey knew he would eventually lose the battle to prevent that from occurring. It took Jim seven months to get Harvey to cave, and after seeing Jim with the dog for the first time Harvey didn’t doubt they had made the right decision. The breed was not one he had expected, but Jim had insisted upon a pitbull mix and there was no shortage of them at the Gotham Animal Shelter to select from.  Which explained how Harvey came to be fending off the tongue of an over friendly gray and white splotched monstrosity of a wiggling puppy at five in the morning.

 

“Goddamn it, Chugger, get off me will ya?”

 

“She’s just happy to see you.” Jim tenderly pointed out as he pulled the not quite a year-old puppy away from Harvey and into his arms. He was sitting up in bed and had pulled the dog into his lap. “I am too.” He admitted leaning down to kiss Harvey’s head, chuckling at the sour look upon Harvey’s face as he wiped it from all the dog slobber now coating it.

 

“If that thing pees on me again it goes back to the pound.”

 

“She only did that because she was overly excited and a little frightened of you.” Jim informed now playing with the dog with his hands and smirking at it. “She hasn’t done it since.”

 

Harvey grumbled something impolite and rose to sit up. He rested his elbows upon his knees and put his head in his hands for a moment and scratched through his hair with his nails. “Every damn day since we got her I wake up with her tongue.” He mumbled rubbing his scalp in addition. He raised his head and sighed, feeling the dog slam into his back a couple of times while she huffed at Jim and played with his hand.  “Does she get to the coffee first or something?”

 

“Nope.” Jim climbed off the bed and Chugger followed him instantly at his side. “But I’ll go get you some.” Jim pulled on a pair of over worn, soft jeans he kept beside the bed to wear as he was a bit modest and would cover his nudity. Harvey wondered if that were a trait of New or Old Jim, but pushed the thought rapidly from his mind. Either way Jim in a pair of jeans and nothing more was sexy as hell.

 

“I love you.” Harvey breathed grateful for the proximity of coffee in his near future.

 

“Love you too.” Jim paused on his side of the bed to kiss his cheek before turning to the open bedroom doorway. “Rise and shine Captain Bullock, the troops are waiting.”

 

“Yeah, yeah.” Harvey rose and creaked and popped until his body fell silent and he made his way to the bathroom. “Me and my stupid sense of duty.”  Harvey liked the new apartment they had moved into shortly after Jim was released from the hospital. It suited them and was more spacious than either of their previous residences. It was centrally located near the precinct and the heart of downtown Gotham, and a miracle find in Harvey’s opinion. It seemed he was blessed with those left and right with Jim and their new life together.

 

Upon exiting the shower Harvey found a steaming cup of coffee upon the high boy dresser in the bedroom, and a suit, shirt and tie laid out upon the bed for him with clean underclothing. “That’s my Jim.” Harvey knew he was indeed. In whatever incarnation Jim Gordon presented him with, Harvey was going to love them all.


End file.
